Pedophiles, Dog Demons, and Areas
by The American Ranger
Summary: Kernel, Grubbs, Bec, Lord Loss, and Baranabus have an odd conversation. Bad at summaries! Spoilers for quite a few of the books! T just for kicks and safety
1. Chapter 1

**(AN- Basically a few random things happen, inappropriate areas are bitten by demons, and Bec**** is clueless.)**

**Just so ya know!**

**Kill 'em all- ****Grubbs**

**Priestess-**** Bec**

**Window guy- ****Kernel**

* * *

**Kill 'em all ****has logged in.**

**Priestess**** has logged in.**

**Kill 'em all****- **Okay, so this is called a chat room.

**Priestess- **Fascinating! But what does it do?

**Kill 'em all-** (Groans) We went through this already!

**Priestess- **Oh, yes! I remember now! Baranabus said that it's where pedophiles go and look for little children!

**Kill 'em all- **Bec, please tell me you actually know what those are.

**Priestess- **(Scratches head) No, I cannot remember Baranabus explaining. What are they?

**Kill 'em all- **I'll tell you when you're older…

**Window guy ****has logged in.**

**Window guy-**Hey guys whatcha talking about?

**Priestess- **We were talking about pedo-

**Kill 'em all- **Dogs. We were talking about dogs.

**Window guy- **Don't mention dogs right now! I just had to fight a dog/frog/bear/lion demon five minutes ago! It bit me in an_ extremely _painful place…..

**Kill 'em all-** Aw, dude don't tell me it bit your…area(chuckles)

**Priestess- **What area? What do you mean?

**Window guy- **Bec, you can be really clueless sometimes. Are you related to Grubbs?

**Kill 'em all- **Stupid, you already knew that!

**Window guy- **Great now I'm stupid

**Kill 'em all- **Yup. And you're bleeding from your area, too.

**Window guy- **(Growls)

**Kill 'em all- **Hey, I'm the werewolf! You aren't allowed to growl at _me_!

**Priestess- **Boys, calm down, please?

**Window guy- **Fine. But….I'm going to make Meera kiss it!

**Kill 'em all- **NO! You little-

**Window guy has logged off.**

**Kill 'em all- **(Sits and seethes, breathing very hard)

**Priestess- **So, what area was Kernel speaking of?

**Kill 'em all has logged off to go rip Kernel's head off.**

**Priestess-** Hmmm….I wonder what the area was? Maybe I'll go ask Bran.

**Priestess has logged off.**

* * *

**(AN- I know, I know short right? Hope you liked it!)**


	2. Chapter 2

**(AN-Okay, I've had a few people ask for a second part to this, so here it is! As usual, enjoy! Oh and 'Half and Half' is Baranabus)**

**Priestess has logged in.**

**Window Guy has logged in.**

**Priestess****- **Hello Kernel!

**Window Guy****- **Um, hey Bec.

**Priestess****- **Why was Grubbs so angry the other day?

**Window Guy****-** Because he's easily aggravated.

**Priestess**- And because you wanted Meera to kiss your ***.

**Window Guy**- So I take it that Baranubus told you about the area.

**Priestess-** Yes. He seemed embarrassed though.

**Window Guy-** Hmm…wonder why.

**Half and Half has logged on.**

**Priestess- **Hello!

**Half and Half-** Hello Bec.

**Window Guy-** How do you know her name?

**Half and Half-** Because I'm-

**Priestess- **The pedophile!

**Window Guy- **I knew it!

**Half and Half-** Kernel! Bec! Stop this nonsense!

**Priestess- **He knows your name too….

**Window Guy- **Look, dude, I can do magic, and I will hurt you.

**Half and Half- **You use magic on me, and I will kill you, then send you back to earth in a box.

**Window Guy- **How the hell did you know I'm not on earth right now?

**Priestess- **He's a pedophile, remember?

**Window Guy- **Oh, right. Well he's more of a stalker.

**Half and Half- **Bec, dear, get off this computer.

**Priestess- **Excuse me, but, dear? I don't know you!

**Window Guy- **Bec, go find Baranabus, he'll know what to do!

**Priestess- **All right.

**Priestess has logged off.**

**Half and Half- **But Kernel, it's me!

**Window Guy- **Knock it off you creep!

**Window Guy has logged off.**

**Half and Half- **Imbeciles.

**Half and Half has logged off to go yell at Kernel.**

**Kill 'em all has logged in.**

**Kill 'em all- **Did I miss something?


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three-**

**AN: Well, you guys wanted more, and here it is! Hmm, I should change the description cuz it isn't exactly a oneshot anymore….**

**Window Guy has logged in.**

**Kill 'em all has logged in.**

**Kill 'em all- **So Baranabus was pretty pissed, huh?

**Window Guy-** That's an understatement. He threatened to make me streak at my old school.

**Kill 'em all- **…BWAHAHA! That's awe-

**Window Guy- ***glares*

**Kill 'em all- **Awful. That's awful.

**Lord Loss has logged in.**

**Kill 'em all- **What the hell are YOU doing here?

**Lord Loss-** Calm down, Grubbitsch….

**Kill 'em all- **No! Get lost!

**Window Guy**- Was that supposed to be a joke?

**Kill 'em all- ***stares*

**Lord Loss**- *raises eyebrow*

**Window Guy- **I'll shut up now.

**Kill 'em all- **Seriously, why are you here?

**Lord Loss**- One of my familiars told me about this, and I was offended that I had not been invited.

**Kill 'em all**- We didn't invite you because you're constantly trying to KILL us!

**Lord Loss**- So?

**Kill 'em all**- …..

**Window Guy**-…..

**Priestess has logged in.**

**Lord Loss- **Hello, Bec.

**Priestess has logged off.**

**Lord Loss**-Was it something I said?

**Half and Half has logged in.**

**Half and Half-** What's going on? Bec just told me Lord Loss is here!

**Lord Loss**- I sure am.

**Half and Half**- Log out right now, or I'll blast you with magic.

**Lord Loss**- How would you do that? This is a chatroom. It's not like I'm right next to you.

**Window Guy**- He has a point, you know.

**Half and Half-** Shut up Kernel.

**Window Guy**- What if I don't want to?

**Half and Half**- Unlike Lord Loss, you are in the room next to me.

**Window Guy has logged off to go hide.**

**Lord Loss**- So, Grubbitsch, feeling any misery today?

**Kill 'em all**- Stop calling me Grubbitsch!

**Lord Loss**- Why? Does it make you angry?

**Kill 'em all**- Yes, it does!

**Lord Loss**- Then I'll keep calling you Grubbitsch.

**Kill 'em all**- *Roars angrily*

**Kill 'em all has logged out.**

**Half and Half has logged out.**

**Lord Loss**- ….these people are way too touchy.

**Lord Loss has logged out.**


End file.
